Sunday, November 7, 2010

From The Vault

For some reason, picture taking is low around here these days, since not much has been going on. So as there is nothing new to display, I thought I would find a cute picture of Gracie from 3 years ago to post. Gracie is 23 months old in this picture and we were living in the apartment where we had a little park outside our front door.

Gus would have been 3 months old at the time of this picture, which is just bizarre to think about. I've spent so much time accustoming myself to the fact the Gus is not alive that I can't even imagine what it would be like if he were somehow alive, right now or any longer that he was.

I've actually come a long way in the Grieving for Gus department and made most of my strides around the 3 year anniversary of losing him. I think it has a lot to do with the fact that I started seeing a counselor back in July. She has worked wonders for my self-esteem, attitude, happiness, and overall outlook on life. I'm not sayin I'm 100% but I'm at least 50% better than I used to be. And a better me with a better life is all I'm lookin for.

I don't think everyone needs counseling but I'm here to tell you that it can't make your life any worse. I'm just so grateful for the way it has evened things out for me. I can be more like the wife and mother I've wanted to be. And I've learned that even though my son died when he was a baby, I can still have a full and fulfilling life. I'm sure I always knew this, but I've only just been able to live it.

Here's to a new outlook.

4 comments:

Jill said...

I'm glad you found someone you like! My counselor retired last May and I'm a little nervous to have another newborn and no counselor! I love having someone to vent to and to bounce things off... and Brad loves for it to not always be him!

stephanie said...

oh, baby gracie. she was so cute!

i'm glad things are brighter for you, mel.

Natalie said...

CUTE pic. I'm so glad counseling helps! Honestly, I think a lot more people (and couples) could benefit from counseling. Everyone has issues to some degree and it's great to be able to have a non-biased, 3rd party to talk to (vent to, rant to, etc).

KatieJ said...

So cute picture- I can't believe how much Gracie has grown! It's good to hear that you are doing well, I can tell just from your blog that you are in a better place lately.
PS- love the cat picture, we have a sweet kitty too and though I'm no animal person, I like her, and don't even mind too much when she sneaks in the house for a bit. I'll miss her when she's gone for sure.